Another Announcement -- Musical Mondays!

Hey there, fellow digressors. So, you're probably wondering (1) what on earth I'm announcing this time, and (2) what exactly 'Musical Mondays' are. Well, since starting the whole series of character interviews, I've been reminded of something I actually discovered a long time ago: I need deadlines. I can try to work without them, but I'll be much more productive if I have some idea of exactly what I'm supposed to do and when it needs to be finished. This has proven true with the character interviews, in that I consistently post those, even when I don't get anything else done. 

So, I am instigating a new tradition: Musical Mondays. Henceforth, Mondays -- while previously dedicated to a celebration of doom, dread, and, um... um... of failed alliterations -- shall bring with them a post containing or related to a piece of music. This could be a hymn, a classical piece, movie score, or one of my own compositions. Anything goes. This flexibility is halfway there to provide variety, and halfway contrived to give my scattered brain freedom to choose whatever its evil little heart desires. (Do brains have hearts? That would be disturbing. Or if a brain literally had a mind of its own, and so you actually had two brains inside your head... That would almost be cool. ANYWAYS.) 

For the first Musical Monday, I am going to share with you a ballad that I wrote just yesterday. A friend from Go Teen Writers shared a song she'd written about one of her characters, and it inspired me to write a ballad of my own. It's called 'Heart of the Innocent', and gives a general outline of one character's developmental arc throughout the books so far. (I could tell you which one, if you like, but I'll withhold that information for the moment, in case anyone out there hates spoilers. And anyways, I think at least four or five characters are mentioned at least vaguely throughout the song.) 

I only have one halfway decent recording, and it's a cappella, because playing the piano might have involved inadvertently waking a couple of adorable kids who were napping nearby. It is by no means a perfect recording, but it should at least give you an idea of how the song is supposed to go. I'll also include the lyrics below, in case you either can't understand them in the video or don't feel inclined to play it at all (shame on you, sir or madam; shame, indeed). Oh -- and this is the first time I've written a ballad, as far as I can remember, so please be gentle. I've only written hymns/spiritual songs previously. Well, I mean, I wrote a lot of poetry when I was younger, and I've read and listened to 'The Highwayman' probably way too many times, but... Anyways, here it is: 

Heart of the Innocent

"Come and hear now the tale

Of the child of a beggar-man,

How his world changed overnight.

All he held dear

Was ripped from his fingertips,

And he tried to make it all right

For the one in his care,

All that remained for him; his life he’d gladly spend

For one little boy

With the heart of an innocent.

The price of his soul

Seemed a small one to pay,

But the deal, it was only the start,

And the child of a beggar-man

Found that his means of escape

Had fallen apart.

But a desperate man, he holds tight to his plans;

He does things that he never meant.

And with one blow,

He shattered the heart of the innocent.

Well, the beggar-man’s child,

His song came to an end

But the shattered heart he left behind

Went searching for love,

Searching for light,

But darkness was all he could find.

Long he lived in the night;

It was all that he knew,

But something inside was still bent

On finding someone

To rebuild the heart of the innocent.

Though the darkness said

There was no light to be found,

The innocent searched, and then

He thought one he met

Would the damage repair,

But they shattered him over again.

Oh hear how he cries,

How his hope, now it dies,

How in fear, to the flames he went.

Now so black,

Black is the heart of the innocent.

Now the light burns his eyes,

And when love comes, he flies.

When he falls, no-one sees his descent

But one girl,

One with the heart of an innocent.

Now the darkness abates

And the innocent waits,

Longs so, but fears to relent.

Is there still hope,

Hope for the heart of the innocent?"

Copyright (c) 2014 by C. F. Barrows

Yes, yes, rest assured the "innocent" hates me with every fiber of his being. But I'm not all that afraid of him, so meh. Even if he did work up the nerve to attack me, he'd probably be horrified at himself afterwards. Here's hoping he never finds any sort of portal into the real world. Do you think the Doctor would help him? Man, that's a scary thought... What if they see me as this big, cruel monster who's bent on gobbling up all the poor little people under my jurisdiction? 

Iiiii'm not sure I really want to think about that. 

OH. Also, a reminder: I'll be taking questions for Sheth Terrem over here until Wednesday. Make sure to get yours in by then! I promise he doesn't bite. He's one of the nice charries. Usually. 

So, heard any good ballads lately? Loreena McKennitt did a gorgeous cover of 'The Highwayman' once. It's somewhat abridged, but it's still ten minutes long, and utterly haunting. I can't speak for or against the rest of her work, but I love that song. It's so much fun to sing, too. The beauty... The flow... The creepiness... 

.........Buuuuut, as always... I digress. 

You Might Be A Writer If...

Hello again, fellow digressors! Well, today was another singularly unproductive day for me, at least until the evening. I pounded out another 961 words (and counting) in my synopsis that I'm writing for this book proposal of mine. Yes, I'm still working on it. Yes, I'm slow. But I'll get there eventually.

I did, however, find out that the 'How To Train Your Dragon 2' soundtrack is excellent writing music. It has the same fun, but epic feel as the first, yet it is unique, and very inspiring. I should probably avoid listening to it at night, though, because it makes me want to do productive things. Sleep? Pah. Sleep is for the weak.

Anyways, as I said, the only really productive thing I did today was write in my synopsis for 'The Merchant's Son' (well, I also responded to some messages, but those didn't really count). Thanks to a creepy ad that played twice last night when I was listening to music (thanks, Spotify), I didn't get a whole lot of sleep. Instead, I spent much of the night either bolstering things against my door (because no-one can get in if I block the door with a big, heavy pillow, right?), or doing a "character chat" with a friend.

Wait, wait -- what's a character chat? Well, it's sort of like a game that writers play with one another, wherein we push our characters into a room (or forest, or wherever) together and force them to interact. A brief excerpt might go something like this:


(Joanna: *walks into the room, looks around and grimaces* Yikes. Who did the decorating in here?)

(Titus: *is sitting on the couch; rolls his eyes* Elvis. Who else?)

(Joanna: *crosses her arms* Elvis, huh? You know him?)

(Titus: I know he's a terrible decorator. *stands, offers his hand* I'm Titus.)

(Joanna: *eyes him, then takes his hand and shakes it stiffly* Joanna. I don't like you.)

(Titus: *chuckles* I can live with that.)


See how it works? It's like a collaborative, improvisational short story. It is so muchly much fun, and actually helps a lot with character development. Think about it -- you're throwing your character into an entirely new situation, and they'll have to explain themselves (or maybe, in Joanna's case, refuse to explain verbally) to these new people, so you'll have to really think about their personality, backstory, motivation, etc. and navigate this uncharted world in a way that is internally consistent with who you've made them to be. In some cases, you might even decide that you don't like how they interact with others and change that. It's just a really great tool. Or at least that's what I tell myself to excuse the inordinate amount of time I spend CCing with friends.

And it's also what I tell myself when characters from different stories end up falling in love, the other author and I "ship" them, and our conversations for the next few months are filled with shrieks and exclamations at how adorable these characters are together.

...Ahem. Yes, I know that's really weird. But it happens, and it's fun. If a bit confusing when trying to talk to non-CCers about the growing list of differences between the book-versions and CC-versions of your characters.

In any case, it's become another one of my weird writerly activities that normal people don't always understand. Or maybe they understand how it works, and just don't find it appealing. That's up to them, of course, but it's one of my favorite things to do in my spare time (of which I have entirely too much). If it sounds interesting to you, there is a group on Facebook that's dedicated to it. Check it out here, if you like.

But besides CCing, there are so many odd things that we writers do sometimes, and those things tend to set us apart from most other people. I can't tell you whether that's good or bad. I guess it's just proof that God made everyone different, so I'm going to assume that our common (or uncommon) quirks are not entirely bad.

So, without further ado, I shall present to you my own version of You Might Be A Writer If...



You might be a writer if...

...Everything with blank space on it is fair game for a note on your latest story. Everything. Notebook, church bulletin, napkin at a restaurant (although please, don't use a cloth napkin)... If it's available and you won't get in trouble for marring it, it's perfect.

...Unusual/unpleasant experiences are not just new stories to tell to your kids someday -- they're writing research. I know not every writer does this, but I've known many who could break a bone, pass out, get their wisdom teeth removed, etc., and among the many thoughts rushing through their head would be, "I have to write down how this feels so I can use it later." (I've done this, too; there is no shame in it.)

...You can't read a book anymore without thinking such things as, "I wish I had written that line." "Wait, was this thing edited?" "Ooo, awesome plot twist. That was very evil. I love it." "I could write better than this." "Oh, no, wait -- I couldn't." "ONE DAY I WILL WRITE BOOKS LIKE THIS. ONLY BETTER."

...You may or may not be an artist, but you have at some point either tried or wanted to try drawing your characters, because seriously -- Pinterest has all these great pictures, but they can't come up with ONE perfect picture of your protagonist? Sheesh. Come on, internet elves -- do your job. 

...The idea of going anywhere without either your laptop or your pencils and trusty notebook terrifies you. 

...You do pay attention in church, and you get a lot out of the sermons. It's just that half of what you "get out of it" is stuff that applies to your story and the issues your characters are dealing with. You might even find yourself pulling out your notebook to jot down a quick note mid-sermon. (It's okay; I do this, too. And hey, C. S. Lewis got the idea for 'The Screwtape Letters' in the middle of a sermon. Not that you should be writing the whole time without paying attention, of course. But I don't see anything wrong with applying what you've learned to your writing. Writing is a means of expression, right? Of teaching? So it makes perfect sense.)

...You're afraid that if the government gets a good look at your internet history, they'll arrest you under suspicion of being a terrorist. Or a serial killer. Or maybe you're just afraid that your parents will think you're hiding something because you've visited, like, a dozen baby name sites in the past hour. ("No, Mom, I'm not pregnant -- I just can't figure out what I want to name this new character!")

...You have a deep appreciation for movie soundtracks, The Piano Guys, classical music, or really any other music that inspires you to write. Billboard Top 100? Meh. Has James Newton Howard released any new soundtracks recently?

...You have checked out the soundtracks from movies, TV shows, or games that you haven't even seen or played. You just heard from a friend that the soundtrack was amazing (or the name 'Hans Zimmer' appeared on the cover), and you just had to try it out.

...If you have a Pinterest account, it is probably filled with storyboards, character profiles, pictures of celebrities who look like your characters, and random boards about books and writing. (Incidentally, if anyone wants to follow me on Pinterest, my profile is here.)

...A trip to the library is a perfectly acceptable excuse for having forgotten to text your best friend back for an hour. (I have done this, and I have had it done to me in return. It is completely understandable.)

...You have your library card number memorized.

...Your stack of books to check out at the library is so tall that the security guard walks over to you to tell you about the upcoming library book sale. (This has actually happened to me.)

...Whenever you get some extra money to throw around, you run to the nearest bookstore and spend it all on those books you've been drooling over for months. (Though I hope you weren't literally drooling on them. Respect the books, please.)

...You half dread, half hope that someone will bring up writing in normal conversation, because you know you'll be talking non-stop about books, writing, plotting, editing, etc., for the next half hour. (Or until someone whacks you in the face with a chair. Whichever comes first.)

...It doesn't matter how socially awkward you are. If you find out the person you just met is another writer, you will automatically have things to talk about all day long. And you just might talk all day long, if people let you. Because hey, this person gets you! They're like you! This means you're not crazy! Or, er... at least you're not the only crazy one.

...You have at least considered writing someone you don't like into your story and torturing their fictional selves.

...You have based a character off of yourself, with some "improvements" (e.g., less clumsy, has a superpower, has great hair, always knows what to say).

...You played make-believe as a kid, but there had to be an actual storyline, and things had to make sense and be interesting. (I got into fights with my little brother because I wanted some secondary characters to die at this particularly foreboding place in our fantasy world. "But if nobody dies, there won't be any reason to be afraid of coming here! That wouldn't be any fun!")

...You want a typewriter. Or at least to use one. You might even own one. (If you do, may I borrow it? Pretty please?)

...You like grey, rainy days, because they mean you get to hole up in your room and either read or pound away at the keyboard. Thunder makes surprisingly good background noise sometimes.

...You possess a vocabulary noticeably more extensive than that of your peers, or if not, you at the very least tend to use antiquated or unnecessarily lengthy words in normal conversation. (Because "if you have big ideas, you have to use big words to express them, haven't you?")

...You know what it's like to adore your antagonist, to hop up and down with glee over the horrible things you're doing to your protagonist, and to smile when family and friends threaten your life because of that dreadful plot twist you showed them.

...You could swear sometimes that your characters are actually alive and that they're really writing this story, not you.

...You are tempted to take pictures of random strangers because OH MY GOODNESS THEY LOOK EXACTLY LIKE YOUR CHARACTER. And it makes you feel like such a creeper, but what's a writer to do? (And anyways, maybe that really is your character, come into the real world to seek his revenge. If so, you'll need documentation so that the police know who's responsible for your untimely demise.)

...You own enough notebooks to build a life-sized replica of the Empire State Building. And at least half of them are full.

...You can't remember a time when you weren't making up stories.

...The idea of anyone hating to read baffles and horrifies you.

...You have a strong opinion on which is better -- paperback, hardback, or eBook. Also an opinion on serif versus sans serif fonts. And possibly of the usage/relevance of the Oxford Comma.

...Discovering a typo in your newest status update triggers a small panic attack and a frantic rush to either delete the post or edit it before anyone finds it.

...You have playlists made up of songs relevant to your characters and/or stories.

...You know what NaNoWriMo is. You know that it is starting in about two and a half weeks, and you are in a frenzy trying to get everything ready before it starts. You are probably equal parts excited and terrified, and wondering how you're going to make time to write all those words in one month. (If you don't know what it is, go and check it out here. And if you decide to join, add tellingHISstory94 to your buddy list; that's me.)

...You go to Google, Bing, or your other preferred search engine, and search for things like 'You Might Be A Writer If'. Or even make your own list. Now, there's an idea.


I hope you have enjoyed reading this post as much as I enjoyed writing it. And now I must be off. I have a synopsis and two novels to write, lines to rehearse, supplements to take, and a bed to occupy. Goodnight, fellow digressors, and God bless. And please comment below with your own writerly moments; I'd love to hear them. Maybe even share your favorite soundtrack or composer with me. I'm always on the lookout for more awesome writing music. Incidentally, some of my favorite artists are Hans Zimmer, James Newton Howard, Harry Gregson-Williams, John Powell, Audiomachine, and Two Steps From Hell (I promise, that last one is not nearly is bad as it sounds; it's more soundtrack-type music, though I'm not in love with every single track). Audiomachine and TSFH have a few tracks that are a little too loud/pounding/screechy for my tastes, but most of their tracks are orchestral and make for excellent, inspiring writing music. And I'm not entirely sure you can go wrong with the others composers I mentioned. They're amazingly talented composers. Their work makes every writing session just that much more productive and awesome.

But, of course... I digress.

Unleashing The Inner Fangirl, And A Book Review/Recommendation!

Well, here I am yet again, trying to be productive, and wandering over to this blog instead. This is becoming an addiction, methinks. I hope you are having a good day, fellow digressors, and that you are being more productive than I. 

I did manage to make some headway last night, though -- I finally got to work on writing a book proposal for one of my novels. Some kind soul posted a sample proposal and introduction online, so that all the "learning by observation" people like me could stop pulling their hair out and wailing over how they had no idea what they were doing. (The sample introduction/proposal, by the way, is here. You're welcome.) 

With some of the mystery taken out of the process, I've discovered that writing proposals can actually be kind of fun. Maybe I'm crazy for thinking that. That's okay; I accepted the reality of my own insanity a long time ago. But really, I have had way too much fun writing the synopsis for the book in question. I'll probably have to pull a Frankenstein on it later by chopping it up and cobbling it back together, but hey, it's better than having a blank page in front of me. (Although I'll probably have to find some alternative to an electric shock to bring it to life, considering that I'm using a computer to write/edit it...) 

Yesterday was an exciting day for me. Nothing big happened, I suppose. It was a Sunday like any other. Well, except that I managed to make it through morning services without having panic issues; that actually made it kind of an awesome Sunday. But after I went home, I decided to do some shopping on Amazon. And by "shopping," I mean, "looking up the same books that I've been drooling over for weeks and trying to talk myself into actually buying the paperbacks." The books were 'Captives' (first in 'The Safe Lands Trilogy') and 'By Darkness Hid' (first in 'The Blood of Kings Trilogy'), both by Jill Williamson. I became acquainted with Jill via a Facebook group/blog called Go Teen Writers, which she and Stephanie Morrill (another awesome author/person) headed up, and not only is she an awesome person with a heart for helping others, but her books are great. She writes what she describes as "weird fiction for teens," which happens to be exactly what I tend to read and write most, though she does a better job of it than I do. The 'Blood of Kings' trilogy happens to be my favorite series ever, actually. (As evidenced by the fact that I'm buying the paperback for 'By Darkness Hid' when I've already read the eBook; I just don't do that.) 

*steps off of fangirling soapbox for a moment to take some deep breaths* Okay. I'm okay now. For the moment, anyways. 

So anyways, the exciting thing was that, when I checked out copies of 'Captives' that other people were selling on Amazon, I found one that is supposedly signed by the author. Yes, it made me happy. No, don't bother going to look for it now, because I already claimed it. Sorry. 

It's unusual for me to purchase paperbacks these days. Why? Well, being a Lymie with no consistently-paying job, who also likes to save her shekels to publish future books, turns me into sort of a tight-wad. Oftentimes, if a book is not available at my local library, I'll just put it on a wishlist, or maybe use gift card money to get the (usually cheaper) eBook version, if that option is available. But I've read a preview of 'Captives' (via a FREE sampler of Jill's writing that is available here), and heard recommendations from friends. Those things, combined with my abiding love for 'Blood of Kings', convinced me to purchase the book, and I've caught myself checking my e-mail way too many times since to see whether the book has shipped yet. (That reminds me, I haven't checked in a while. *scurries off to check it, then comes back*) 

When the book gets here and I've read through it, I will be more than happy to post my review for you lovely people to read. Until then, here is my review of 'By Darkness Hid' (which can be purchased here): 

"I learned about this book through a writer's group which the author, Jill Williamson, helps manage. The premise intrigued me, and the idea of Christian, non-magical -- well, unless you count the bloodvoicing as magic -- fantasy also excited me. [EDIT: I have since read the other books, which are also awesome, and discovered that it is not non-magical, but the magic involved is handled very well.] I decided at once that I wanted to read it. I spent months drooling over it, putting it on every wishlist, longing desperately to dive into the story therein. 

I was not disappointed. 

From the first pages, I connected with Achan, and rooted for him through every trial and disappointment. What angered him made me livid, and what made him sad brought tears to my eyes. When I reached Vrell's first chapter, I was prematurely disappointed, sure I could not love her as much as I had Achan. She quickly proved me wrong, and I ripped through the pages (well, digital pages), anxious to see what would happen next, holding my breath whenever it seemed her secret (revealed to the reader early on) might be revealed. I found the world well-developed and believable, the characters well-rounded and dynamic, and the storyline exhilarating, heart-wrenching, humorous (in a good way), and breathtaking in its turns. I highly recommend this book (and the books following) to anyone who loves fantasy -- Christian or no -- or just a good, well-written story. I look forward to the next book! *runs off to purchase and read book two*" 

So there you have it. I should also note that I don't often remember to leave reviews for books, either, but I just had to trumpet about this one. And if you're looking for a blog with great advice for writing and editing, with contests and fellowship with other teen authors (well, okay, some of us are older, but it's geared towards teens), check out Go Teen Writers here. There's also a Facebook page full of young writers who actively discuss books and writing, encourage one another, and sometimes even act as beta-readers. Seriously, it's great. I hope to see you there, if you aren't already a member! 

...I came on here intending to write a semi-serious post to raise awareness for something, or to give some sort of devotional thought for the day. I failed. But hey, fangirling works, too, doesn't it? Of course it does. Also talking to yourself. You know, some studies have indicated that people who talk to themselves are actually smarter than people who don't do the same. I guess that means I must be a very smart person, indeed. I wonder where you'd go to get that tested... 

...But of course, I digress. 

Getting To Know You... Oh, Wait, Never Mind -- That's Me.

Well, here I am, starting a blog at long last. Fantastic, allons-y, geronimo, and all that stuff. I am in no way new to writing in general, but as this is my first time posting for all you lovely people, I will introduce myself.

Hello. My name is Carissa Barrows. Some of you might know me as C. F. Barrows, or you may not. That's my pen name. Very creative, I know. No-one must ever learn my true name. Ever. Disaster and a painful, untimely demise would ensue.

Oh, wait... I've just told you my real name, haven't I? Whoops.

Ah, well. Now that I have secured my own doom, I might as well continue with my introduction. I have self-published two novels so far, and have no intention of stopping anytime soon. I was homeschooled all the way from preschool to my high school graduation, and don't regret it in the slightest. I think if you asked most people to give one trait by which to identify me, they would say that I carried a book everywhere. Going to church? Maybe I'd get to read between services. A movie theater? Well, maybe the previews would be boring, and I'd have to ride in the car to get there, anyways. Whether I love books has never been in question.

It's a little more complicated, however, to answer the question of how I came to write my own books. I've been making up stories for as long as I can remember, and writing them down since I was a child. I've also dabbled a great deal in poetry, and written a few songs. When I speak with old friends who have not seen me for a long time, very few are surprised that I decided to become a novelist.

Me, an overly imaginative child? Me, have my head in the clouds to such an extent that everyone wondered whether I even knew how to stand on solid ground? Nahhhhh.

To be fair, I also have other interests. For example, I've grown up in a musical family who fostered in me a love for music. I am a coloratura soprano (high range, lesser power than a dramatic soprano), and have played the piano for thirteen years. I write vocal songs (as I mentioned earlier) and like to compose pieces for the piano, and also play by ear. I also know the basics of violin, and can play guitar and harmonica (my Hohner chromatic harmonica is awesome). Not a day goes by in which I do not immerse myself somehow in music. I also love to sketch, mostly portraits of people. Every notebook I own, and nearly every sheet of paper I have used in my lifetime, is covered in drawings, and if one could be arrested for drawing her own characters too many times, I would be a jailbird for the rest of my life. I am also a perfectionist. Perfectionism is a hobby, right?

I am also a Chronic Lyme Disease sufferer. This is a controversial condition which many in the medical community say cannot exist, so it brings with it some stigma and, admittedly, a fair amount of frustration. It is a degenerative disease, and can affect virtually any part of the body. Many of my symptoms are neurological, culminating in brain fog, clinical depression and anxiety, neuropathy, photophobia, chronic fatigue, and a myriad of other symptoms. I contracted the disease when I was perhaps sixteen, and was diagnosed at age eighteen. I am thankful to say that I have received proper treatment, and seem to be on the path of recovery. However, there are many who cannot say the same.

A heartbreaking number of chronic Lyme sufferers go to their doctors for help and are told that their symptoms are all in their heads, or that some other condition is to blame. Some have to travel to other states just to get the proper treatment, and doctors can get into trouble for tackling these cases. And even if the patients find a Lyme-literate doctor who is willing to treat them, often their insurance companies will not pay for their treatment.

It is an ugly disease, and changes the lives of those who contract it and are unfortunate enough to become chronic sufferers. So how do I do the things I do when my body is worn out, my brain is scattered and fog-ridden, and everything within me wants to just go back to bed and watch Netflix on my iPad all day? (Seriously, though, I love my iPad. It is so nice for those days when I'm too lazy/dizzy/fatigued to sit up.) How do I push myself to write books, of all things, when it takes me all of two seconds to forget what someone has said to me? (You haven't said anything yet, have you? No? Okay, just checking.)

Well, the truth is, I don't. Not alone, anyways. I have an awesome family and great friends who are there with me every step of the way, and support me even when I'm irritable, depressed, freaking out at everything that moves, or unsure what I had for breakfast this morning (or even if I had said breakfast).

And above all, I have my Lord and savior, Jesus Christ. I don't talk about Him as much as I should, and I won't try to claim the title of "Best Christian" anytime soon, because even if such a title existed, I would not be worthy to claim it. But He loves me through my randomness, my ups and downs, my wordy lectures and my befuddling outbursts, and the days where I don't have the strength to take another step.

"I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing." - John 15:5, KJV

The above verse is very true for me. Without God, I could do nothing. Zip. Nada. Pack your bags and go home, because the show is canceled, if I even remembered to cancel the show. (What was that show called, again?)

So if you ever read one of my books or blog posts, hear one of my songs, or see one of my sketches, remember that He's the one who enabled me to do all those things. And by His grace, I hope to turn this blog into something that enriches your life, whether in the areas of your own faith, learning to write more effectively, finding good books to read, picking a great movie to rent on Movie Night, or discovering a great recipe for egg nog, or an archive of awesome Doctor Who quotes to make your day. Or C. S. Lewis quotes. Did I mention I really like C. S. Lewis? 'The Screwtape Letters' is an awesome book, and no-one can deny. I shall have to talk about it sometime...

...But, of course... I digress.